OF THE BENEFITS OF ALMIGHTY GOD.
THIS DAY (WHEN THOU HAST MADE THE SIGN OF THE CROSS, and prepared thyself hereunto,) thou hast to meditate upon the benefits of almighty God: that in so doing thou mayest give him thanks for them, and enkindle in thyself a more fervent love of him, who hath shewed himself so bountiful towards thee, and withal procure thereby more grief and sorrow for the sins and offences that thou hast committed against such a loving benefactor.
And albeit the benefits of almighty God towards us be innumerable, yet they all may be reduced to five kinds: to wit, to the benefits of creation, conservation, redemption, vocation, and to the secret benefits, that every one hath received particularly in himself.
As concerning the first benefit, which is of creation, Consider first with great attention what thou wast before thou were created, and what almighty God hath done for thee, and bestowed upon thee, before thou didst merit or deserve any thing at all: to wit, he gave thee thy body with all thy members, and senses, and thy soul which is of so great excellency, created after his own image and likeness for so high and excellent an end, as to have the fruition of almighty God. And withal he gave thee those three noble powers also of thy soul, which be, Understanding, Memory, and Will. And consider well with thyself, that to give thee this soul was to give thee all things. For it is clear that there is no perfection nor hability in any of all the inferior creatures, but that man hath the same in him in a far more high and greater perfection, and by means of the virtue and hability of his soul he is able to attain unto it. Whereby it appeareth, that by giving unto us this thing alone, (to wit, our soul) he gave us therewith at once all things together.
As concerning the benefit of conservation, consider how all thy whole being dependeth of the providence of almighty God: How thou art not able to live one moment, nor to step so much as one step, were it not by means of him. Consider also, how he hath created all things in this world for thy use, and service: insomuch as he hath appointed even the very Angels of heaven for thy guard, and defense. Consider moreover, how he hath given thee health, strength, life, sustenance, with all other temporal helps, and succors. And above all this, consider well the manifold great miseries, and calamities, into which thou seest other men fall every day, and how thou thyself mightest also have fallen into the same, had it not been that almighty God of his great mercy preserved thee.
As concerning the benefit of redemption thou mayest consider therein two things. First, how many and how great benefits almighty God hath given us by means of the benefit of redemption. And secondly, how many and how great miseries he hath suffered in his most holy body and soul to purchase these benefits unto us.
As concerning the benefit of vocation, consider first of all, what a great benefit it was of almighty God to make thee a Christian, to call thee to the Catholic faith by means of the holy Sacrament of Baptism, and to make thee also partaker of the other Sacraments. And then if after this calling of thee thou hast fallen into deadly sin, and thereby lost thine innocency, in case now our Lord have raised thee up from sin, and received thee again into his grace, and favor, and set thee in the state of salvation, how canst thou be able to give him sufficient praises and thanks for this so inestimable a benefit? What a great mercy was it to expect thee so long time? To suffer thee to commit so many sins? And in the mean time to send thee so many divine inspirations? And not to shorten the days of thy life, as he hath done to diverse and sundry others, that were in the very same state? And last of all, to call thee with so mighty a grace, that thou mightest rise up again from death to life, and open thine eyes to behold the eternal light? What a great mercy was it also (after that thou wast converted) to give thee grace not to return unto deadly sin again, but to stand and vanquish thine enemy, and to persevere in good life? This is that morning and evening dew that almighty God promised by the Prophet Joel, saying: And ye sons of Sion rejoice, and be glad in our Lord God: for he hath given you a teacher of justice, and he shall cause the morning and evening dew to rain and pour down upon you. Meaning hereby that almighty God giveth us first his preventing grace, wherewith we begin to sow the seed of virtues: and afterwards he giveth us his grace subsequent, and final, which bringeth this seed to his full ripeness, and happy end.
These are the public and known benefits. But besides these there be other secret benefits, which no man knoweth but he only that hath received them. Again, there be other benefits also so secret that even he himself that hath received them knoweth not of them: and he only knoweth them that is the giver of them. How many times hast thou deserved in this world either through thy pride, negligence, or unthankfulness, that almighty God should have withdrawn his grace from thee, and utterly forsaken thee, as he hath done to many others for some one of these causes, (for whosoever they be that do fall from God, they fall by some of these means,) and yet hath not almighty God dealt thus with thee? How many evils and occasions of evils hath our Lord prevented and turned away by his providence, in overthrowing the snares of the devil thine enemy, and stopping him of his passage, and not permitting him to execute his wily practices and deceits upon thee? How oftentimes hath he done for every one of us, as he said he did for St. Peter? Behold, (saith our Savior) how Satan goeth busily about to sift you as corn in the barn, but I have prayed for thee, that thy faith fail not. Now who knoweth these secrets, but only almighty God. The positive benefits be such as a man may sometimes understand and know them: but those benefits that are called privative, which consist not in doing benefits unto us, but in delivering us from hidden and secret evils that were coming toward us, who is able to understand? Wherefore as well for these benefits, as for the others, it is reason we should always shew ourselves thankful to our Lord, and understand how far in arrearages we be in our reckoning with him, and how much more we be indebted unto him, than we are able to pay, considering we are not able so much as to understand what they are.
THE SEVENTH TREATISE: OF THE CONSIDERATION of the benefits of almighty God: wherein the former meditation is declared more at large.
One of the greatest complaints that almighty God maketh against men, and wherewith he will most charge them at the day of their accompt, is their unthankfulness and ingratitude for his manifold benefits. With this kind of complaint the Prophet Isaias beginneth the first words of his prophecy, calling heaven and earth to witness against the ingratitude and unthankfulness of the wicked. Hearken (saith he) O heaven, and thou earth give ear unto my words, for our Lord hath spoken it: I have nourished children, and exalted them, and they have despised me: The ox knoweth his owner, and the Ass his masters manger: but Israel hath not known me, neither would my people understand me. Now what thing is more strange, than that men should not acknowledge that thing, which the very brute beasts do acknowledge. And as St. Jerome saith upon this place: The Prophet would not compare men with other living beasts that are more quick of sense, as with the dog, that for a little piece of bread defendeth his masters house, but even with the Ox, and Ass, which are more dull, and rude: giving us hereby to understand, that ingrateful and unthankful persons are not to be likened to every kind of beasts, but that they be much more brutish than the most brutish beasts that are.
Now what punishment (trow ye) doth so great beastliness deserve? Almighty God hath prepared many punishments for ingrateful persons: but the most just and ordinary punishment is to spoil them of all those benefits they have received, because they would not give thanks to the giver of them as of duty they ought to have done. For as St. Bernard saith: Ingratitude is as it were a burning wind, that drieth up the river of Gods mercy, the fountain of his clemency, and the flowing stream of his grace.
Now as unthankfulness is the cause of so great evils, even so contrariwise thankfulness is the beginning of very great graces, and especially of three. The first is the love of God. For (as Aristotle saith) goodness is amiable of itself, and every man is naturally most inclined to love his own proper weal. Seeing therefore that men be naturally such lovers of themselves, and of their own proper commodity, when they see plainly that all that they have cometh of the gracious goodness of that chiefest benefactor, forthwith they be moved to love, and wish well unto him, whom they perceive and acknowledge to have bestowed so great benefits upon them. And hereof it cometh, that among the considerations that do most help us to attain unto the love of God, one of the most principal is the consideration of the benefits of almighty God. For every one of these benefits is as it were a firebrand that quickeneth and enkindleth more and more the flame of this love: and so consequently, to consider many of these benefits, is to join many firebrands together, whereby the flame of this fire is enkindled more and more in us.
This consideration helpeth also to stir up a desire in a man to serve almighty God when he considereth the great bounden duty, that he oweth unto him, unto whom he is so much indebted. For if the very birds and brute beasts be moved herewith to answer unto the voice of him that calleth them and do obey (as though they were reasonable creatures) unto all such things as are commanded them: how much greater provocations have we to do the like unto almighty God, that have received far more than they, and be able to understand far better then they, what great and inestimable benefits we have received from God.
This consideration is also profitable to stir and provoke in our souls a sorrow and repentance for our sins. For when a man considereth and weigheth deeply on the one side the multitude of benefits he hath received of almighty God, and on the other side the great number of offences he hath committed against him, how can he choose but be ashamed of himself? How can it be but that he must needs be confounded, and discern much better the black by comparing it with the white? I mean hereby, he shall much better discern the greatness of his own wickedness, by comparing the same with the greatness of Gods passing great goodness, who hath continued so long time in doing good unto him, that contrariwise hath continued evermore for his part in heaping sin upon sin against almighty God.
For these three ends therefore ought a man to consider the benefits of almighty God: and withal in the consideration of them to give him most humble thanks for the same. So that when he setteth himself to meditate upon the benefits of almighty God, he must then be careful to have his recourses unto these three points in their due places, applying his heart some times to love him, who hath been so greatly beneficial unto him: some times to desire to serve him: some times again to be sorrowful and repentant for his sins: yea and some times also to offer unto him sacrifice of praise, and thanks giving for his so manifold benefits. These sacrifices are signified by those calves of our lips, which the Prophet would have us to offer unto almighty God for the benefits that we have received of him.
True it is, that the benefits of almighty God be innumerable, but we will treat here only of five kinds of benefits, which are of all others the most chief, and principal, and whereunto all the others may be reduced. These five are the benefits of creation, conservation, redemption, vocation, and finally the particular and secret benefits that every particular person may recognize and acknowledge in himself.
And it is not required of a man to think upon all these benefits at one time, but it shall suffice to think upon one, or two, or three of them, and to consider and ponder them well and diligently in his mind. For the exercises of meditation are not to be taken in lumps, as a task, that must be fully wrought and finished within a certain time, but as a daily food, and sustenance, which the more moderately and temperately it is taken, and the better it is digested, the more profitable and wholesome it is to a man.
OF THE BENEFIT OF CREATION.
To begin now with the benefit of creation: that thou mayest the better understand somewhat of the greatness of this benefit, thou shalt do well to consider first very deeply with thyself, what thou wast before thou were created. This is one of the principal advices, that the masters of the spiritual life do use to give in this behalf, as well for the understanding of the greatness of this benefit, as also for the annihilation (as they term it,) which is, that a man may hereby clearly and palpably perceive how of himself he is no more than very nothing. Consider then how it is not many years sithence, not a thousand, nor an hundred years, but even as it were yesterday, that is, within a very small time, that thou wast nothing, (at least wise as concerning thy soul) and from the beginning thou wast nothing, and mightest for ever have been nothing, that is, less than a clod of earth, less than a puff of wind, yea less than a straw, and to be short even nothing.
Consider then how the same nothing could not make itself any thing, and as little could it deserve that an other should make it any thing, for that party that is not, can neither work, nor deserve. Now when thou wast in this darkness, and in this deep bottomless pit of the same nothing, it pleased the infinite goodness and mercy of almighty God, before any desert of thine, only of his mere grace, to shew upon thee his power, and omnipotency, and with his mighty hand to pluck thee out of this darkness, and out of this deep bottomless pit of no being, and to bring thee to a being, and to make thee somewhat: and (as St. Augustine saith) not every somewhat, not a stone, not a bird, not a toad, not a serpent, but even a man, which is one of the most noble creatures in the world. He gave thee this being that thou now hast. He compacted and framed this thy body, and beautified it in all parts, both with members and senses, and that with such a wonderful providence, and art, that every one of them (if they be well considered) is of itself a great wonder, and a very great benefit. This is that benefit which the holy man Job did most humbly acknowledge, when he said: Thy hands (O Lord) have made me, they have given me a due proportion in every part. Remember O Lord that thou hast made me, as it were of a lump of clay, and that thou shalt reduce me again into dust. Thou hast clothed me with skin, and flesh: Thou hast compacted me with bones, and sinews: Thou hast given me life, and mercy, and hast preserved my spirit with thy visitation.
Now what shall I say of the nobleness of thy soul, and of the excellency of the end for which it was created, and of the image and capacity that it hath. The image thereof is the image of almighty God himself. For in very deed there is nothing in all the earth that more resembleth almighty God, there is nothing whereby we may come to a more evident knowledge of him than by the soul. And therefore the ancient Philosophers (and namely Anaxagoras) knew no meeter name to be given unto God, than Mens, (the Mind,) which is as much to say, as a reasonable soul, by reason of the great similitude and likeness that they perceived to be between God, and it. And this is the cause why the substance of our soul can not be perfectly understood. For being as it is very like unto the substance of God, (which can not be known in this life) it followeth that the substance of the soul is also a thing not able to be known here by us.
Now the end for which this noble creature was created, is answerable to this dignity. For it is manifest that the soul was created to be partaker of that blessed glory and felicity of almighty God, to dwell in his house, to eat at his table, to enjoy those things that almighty God himself enjoyeth, to be clothed with the same garment of immortality that he himself is clothed withal, and to reign everlastingly with him.
And hereof it cometh, that the soul hath such a wonderful capacity: which is so great, that all the creatures and riches of the world put together, are no more able to fill her capacity, than a barley corn is able to fill all the whole world.
Now therefore, what recompence shall we make unto our most gracious and bountiful Lord for this so passing great benefit? If we think ourselves to be so much bound to our carnal parents, for that they have been some part in the building of this our body, how much more are we indebted unto our heavenly father, who by means of our parents hath formed our bodies, and without them hath created our souls, which be without comparison more excellent than the body, and without which our body were no better than a stinking dunghill? What are our parents, but only an instrument whereby almighty God hath made a small portion of this work? Now if thou be so much bound to the instrument of the work, how much more art thou bound to the principal agent, that made the work? And if thou be so much bound unto him, who was only a mean in framing one part, how much more art thou bound unto almighty God that made the whole? If thou esteem a sword so much wherewith a city was conquered, how much more oughtest thou to esteem the king himself that conquered it.
OF THE BENEFIT OF CONSERVATION.
And our Lord hath not only created thee in such great dignity, and glory, but it is he also that maintaineth and conserveth thee after thy creation in the same? As he himself witnesseth by the Prophet Isaias, saying: I am thy Lord thy God, that do teach thee whatsoever is meet for thee to know, and do govern thee in the way that thou walkest. Many mothers there be, that think it sufficient to sustain only the travail of child bearing: they will not burthen themselves with nourishing their children, but will seek out some other nurse that may discharge them of that trouble. But almighty God dealeth not so with us: for he vouchsafeth to take upon himself the whole charge, and burthen: insomuch as he is both the mother that bare us, and the nurse that nourisheth us with the milk and cherishings of his providence: according as he himself witnesseth by one of his Prophets: saying: I was as it were the nurse of Ephraem, and carried them in mine arms, and they understood not that I had care of them. So that our Lord himself is both the creator and conserver of all things that be created. And like as without him nothing is made, even so were it not for him, all things would go to utter ruin, and decay. The Prophet David confesseth plainly both the one and the other in these words: The eyes of all things do look upon thee O Lord, and thou givest them their food in due season. And whilst thou givest it, they receive it, and when thou stretchest forth the hand of thy bountiful goodness, they are replenished and satisfied with all such things as they stand in need of. But if thou (O Lord) turn thy face away from them, they shall forthwith be disappointed, and utterly fail, and return again to the same dust whereof they were made. Whereby it appeareth that like as all the moving and order of a clock dependeth of the wheels that do draw it, and make it go, insomuch that if they should stay, immediately all the whole frame and moving of the clock would stay also: even so all the workmanship of this great frame of the world dependeth wholly of the providence of almighty God, in such sort that if his divine providence should fail, all the rest would fail out of hand withal.
But how many benefits (trowest thou) are contained in this one benefit. Truly every minute and moment of an hour that thou livest are parts of this benefit. For thou couldest not live, nor have any being so much as one minute if almighty God should withdraw his providence, and turn his eye away never so little from thee. All creatures in the world are part of this benefit. For we see that they all do serve to this end. Insomuch as the heaven is thine, the earth is thine, yea, the Sun, the Moon, the stars, the sea, the fishes, the birds, the trees, the living beasts, and to be short, all things in the world be thine: forsomuch as they all are appointed to do thee service. This is that benefit which the Prophet wondered so much at, when he said: What is man O Lord, that thou shouldest be mindful of him: and what is the son of man, that thou dost so visit him? Thou hast crowned him with glory, and honor, and hast made him Lord over all the works of thy hands. Thou hast put all things under his feet, sheep, oxen, and all the beasts of the field, the birds of the air, and the fishes of the sea, that walk over the paths of the Sea. O Lord our God, how wonderful is thy name over all the earth.
And almighty God hath vouchsafed not only to appoint all visible creatures for the service and behoof of man, but hath also of his great mercy appointed the invisible creatures, to wit, those most noble and excellent understandings, that be always in his presence, and behold his divine face. For as St. Paul saith: They be all officers in this great house and family of almighty God, unto whom is committed the defense and safeguard of men. Finally, he hath employed all the whole world to do thee service, to the intent that thou shouldest in like manner employ thyself in his service. And his will is, that there should be no one creature either under the heaven or above exempted from serving and helping thee. And this hath he done, that there should be nothing within thee, that should not likewise be employed in serving of him.
And although peradventure thou runnest slightly over all these things, yet oughtest thou not so to pass over the benefits that almighty God hath done unto thee in delivering thee from infinite mishaps, and calamities, which we see do daily happen to other men. Thou seest how one is troubled with the palsy, an other is blind, an other lame, an other broken legged, an other sore vexed with the stone, and others with the strangury, gout, fistula, or with other like terrible diseases, and miseries. For to say the very truth, this world is nothing else but a main sea of infinite troubles, calamities, and miseries, and scarcely canst thou find any one house in all this land of Egypt free from sighing, mourning, grief, and sorrow. And now tell me (pray thee) who hath granted unto thee this bull and patent of exemption, to be quit and free from these so grievous calamities, and miseries? Who hath given thee so great a privilege, that among such a number of diseased and wounded persons, thou shouldest be free, and sound: and among such a number that do daily fall, thou shouldest yet stand upright upon thy feet? Art not thou a man as all others? A sinner as all others? And the son of Adam as all others? If then all these evils and miseries do come either on the behalf of nature, or else of sin, and the very same causes are in thee, how is it, that the very same effects are not also in thee? Who hath suspended the effects from their causes? Who hath stayed the streams of the waters, that thou shouldest not perish with others in this common flood, but only the very grace of God? Wherefore if thou cast this accompt aright, thou shalt find that all the miseries of this world are benefits unto thee, and that for every one of them in particular thou owest a special thankfulness and love unto almighty God. So that by the benefit before alleged thou mayest perceive, that all the good things in the world are benefits bestowed upon thee, (forsomuch as they all do serve for thy conservation:) and now also by this mayest thou understand, that all the miseries and evils in the world are likewise benefits unto thee, in that our Lord hath delivered thee from them all.
OF THE BENEFIT OF REDEMPTION.
Let us come now unto the inestimable benefit of our redemption: although it should be much better to adore this mystery with an holy silence, than to speak of it in such gross and base wise as we must do with our mortal tongue. Thou didst lose through sin that first innocency and grace wherein thou wast created, and almighty God might with good equity and justice have left thee in that miserable state, (as he left the devil) and none should have been able to have reproved him therefore. And yet he would not so do, but rather contrariwise changing his anger into mercy, it pleased him of his infinite goodness to bestow greatest benefits at that time, when he was most provoked to wrath with greatest offences. And whereas he might have repaired this loss of innocency by sending some Angel, or Archangel, or by some other means, he would not so do, but vouchsafed to come even himself in person. And whereas he might have come with great majesty, and glory, he abased himself so far, as to come in great humility, and poverty. And this he did, to cause thee to be the more in love with him by reason of this benefit: and to make thee the more beholding unto him by this example: and to make thy redemption the more aboundant by reason of the great treasure, that he bestowed upon it: and to give thee more clearly to understand how much good will he beareth unto thee, that thou shouldest bear towards him the like again: and to shew plainly unto thee how much interest thou hast in him, that thou shouldest repose thy whole trust and affiance in him. This is that benefit, which the Prophet Isaias extolleth (and that for great good cause) in these words: which after the translation of the Septuagintes sound thus, In all the tribulations of men he never fainted, neither was he ever weary in suffering for them. Neither would he send any Ambassador or Angel to redeem them, but vouchsafed of his great mercy to come himself in person to redeem them, and to carry them upon his shoulders all the days of this world, notwithstanding that they did evil acknowledge this benefit, but did grieve and provoke the holy Ghost to anger.
And if thou be so much bound to our Lord for that he vouchsafed to come himself in person to redeem thee, how much more art thou bound unto him for the manner of thy redemption, which was by suffering so great pains, and torments? It were certainly a great benefit, if a king would pardon a thief that had deserved to be whipped: But if the king would vouchsafe himself to receive the lashes upon his own shoulders for him, this were without comparison a far greater benefit. Consider therefore how many benefits are comprehended in this benefit of thy redemption. Lift up thine eyes unto that holy rood, and consider all the wounds, and pains, that the Lord of majesty suffereth there for thy sake. For every one of them is a benefit of itself, yea, and a singular great benefit. Behold that most innocent body of thy sweet Savior and redeemer all of a gore blood, with so many wounds and bruises on all parts of him, and the blood gushing out on every side. Behold that most sacred head falling down for very faintness, and hanging upon his shoulders. Behold that divine face (which the Angels are desirous to behold) how disfigured it is, and overflowed with streams of blood, in some parts fresh, and red colored, in other parts very foul, and black. Behold that most beautiful visage of all creatures, and that countenance that delighted the eyes of all such as beheld it, how it hath now lost all the flower of his former beauty. Behold that holy Nazareth, more pure than snow, more white than milk, better colored than old Juery, how he is now become blacker than coals, and so much disfigured, and berayed, that scarcely his own friends are able to know him. Behold that holy mouth, how wane and deadly it looketh. Behold his lips, how black and blue they seem: Behold how they move, desiring pardon, and mercy, even for those that are his very tormentors.
Finally, wheresoever thou beholdest him, thou shalt find that there is no one part of him free from pain, and grief, but that he is covered all over with lashes, and wounds, even from the top of his head to the soles of his feet. That goodly clear forehead, and those eyes more beautiful than the Sun, are now dimmed and darkened with the blood and presence of death. Those ears that are wont to hear the songs of heaven, do now hear the horrible blasphemies of sinners. Those arms so well fashioned and so large that they embrace all the power of the world, are now disjointed, and stretched out upon the cross. Those hands that created the heavens, and were never injurious to any man, are now nailed and clenched fast with hard and sharp nails. Those blessed feet that never walked in the ways of sinners, are now deadly wounded, and pierced through. But above all this, behold the bed where he lieth, and whereupon that heavenly bridegroom sleepeth at noon day, how narrow and hard it is, and how he hath nothing whereupon to rest his head. O precious head of my sweet savior! What meaneth this, that I see thee thus afflicted and tormented for my sake? O blessed body, conceived by the holy Ghost! How is it, that I see thee thus wounded and evil entreated for my sake? O sweet and loving side! What meaneth this great wound and open cleft in thee? What meaneth this so great abundance of blood? Alas wretch that I am, what a pitiful sight is this, to see thee thus furiously pierced with a spear for my sake? O rigorous cross, be not now I beseech thee so stiff, but mollify a little thy hardness, bow down unto me these high branches, let down to me this most precious fruit, that I may taste thereof. O cruel nails, leave I pray you those innocent hands and feet of my innocent Savior, and come and enter into my heart, and pierce it through: for it is I that have sinned, and not he. O good Jesus, what hast thou to do with so many cruel torments? What hast thou to do with death? With sharp nails? And with the cross? Undoubtedly the Prophet had good reason to say: That his works shall be very strange, and far unlike himself. What is more strange and more contrary to life, than death? What is more disagreeable to glory, than pain? What is further of from the nature of most perfect holiness, and innocency, than the image and shape of a sinner? This title and shape O Lord, is certainly very strange for thee. O true Jacob, that with wearing the garments of others, and with disguising thyself in a strange habit, hast purchased for us the blessing of our heavenly father! For by taking upon thee the image of a sinner, thou hast purchased for us victory against sin. O goodness unspeakable! O mercy undeserved! O love exceeding all understanding! O charity incomprehensible! Tell me (O most merciful Lord) what sawest thou in us? What service have we done unto thee? With what works have we bound thee to suffer such grievous and cruel torments for our sakes? O wonderful bountifulness, that without any merit of our part, and without any necessity of thine own part, wouldst vouchsafe only of thy mere grace, and mercy, to purchase our redemption after this sort! The benignity and clemency of our savior (saith the Apostle) hath appeared, not in respect of the works of justice that we have done, but according to his great mercy he hath saved us. O how wonderful desirous was our most gracious Lord, that we should understand his mercy, when by the Prophet Isaias he spake those so notable words: Thou hast not called upon me O Jacob, and thou O Israel hast not travailed in my service. Thou hast not offered unto me thy rams in a whole burnt sacrifice, neither hast thou glorified me with thy sacrifices, etc. And yet for all this, thou hast made me to serve in thy sins, and hast put me to pains with thine iniquity. It is I, It is I, that do pardon thy sins for mine own sake, and that will never be mindful of them. Put me in mind, and let us enter into judgement: and shew if thou have any thing wherewith to justify thyself.
Wherefore O most merciful and sweet Lord, what thing is there in me, wherewith I may recompence thee for this so great benefit? If I should live all the lives of the children of Adam, and all the days and years of the world, If I were able to sustain all the travails and pains of all the men that either be, hath been, or shall be, all this were as nothing to recompence the very least grief and pain that thou hast suffered for me. Considering therefore that I can by no means possible discharge this inestimable great debt, let me pay thee O my almighty God if it be thy blessed will with the continual remembrance of the same. I beseech thee O Lord even by the bowels of thy infinite charity, that thou wilt wound my heart with thy wounds, and make my soul drunk with thy most precious blood, in such sort that whither so ever I shall turn myself, I may always see thee crucified, and wheresoever I shall cast mine eyes, all things may seem unto me to shine with thy precious blood. Let this be all my consolation to be always crucified with thee: and let this be all my affliction to think upon any other thing besides thee. Consider O my almighty God the great price wherewith thou hast bought me, and suffer not so precious a treasure to be shed in vain for me. And grant me O most merciful Lord, that I be not as a child that is born before his time, whom his mother bringeth forth with exceeding great travail, and pain, and yet he enjoyeth not the commodity and fruit of life.
OF THE FOURTH BENEFIT: TO WIT, OF Vocation.
After this, think upon the benefit of Vocation or calling of almighty God, without which all the other benefits tend to the greater damnation of a man. But here it is to be noted, that there be two kinds of callings of almighty God: one unto faith, by means of the Sacrament of Baptism: and an other unto grace, after that a man hath lost the first innocency which he had by baptism.
Consider now what a great benefit the first calling of thee was by means of the Sacrament of holy Baptism, whereby thou was cleansed from original sin, delivered from the power of the devil, made the son of almighty God, and an inheritor of his kingdom. There he took thy soul to be his spouse, and adorned it with such ornaments, as were convenient for such a state: to wit, with grace, and with the virtues, and gifts of the holy Ghost, and also with other jewels, and gifts, that are far more precious than those that were given to Rebecca, when she was taken to be the spouse of Isaac. Now what hast thou done, whereby to deserve so great a benefit as this is? How many thousands not only of men, but also of nations and whole countries are there, that by the just judgement of almighty God do not obtain this inestimable great benefit? What had become of thee, if thou hadst been born among those infidels, and wanted this knowledge of the true living God, and worshipped stocks, and stones for God, as the infidels do? How much art thou bound to almighty God, that among such an infinite number of lost and damned souls, it pleased him that thou shouldest be saved, yea and be born in the lap of the Catholic Church, and be nourished there with the milk of the Apostles, and with the precious blood of our sweet Savior Jesus Christ.
Now if after the grace of this first calling thou hast through thine own default and sinful life lost the innocency which thou receivedst in the Sacrament of Baptism, in case it hath pleased our Lord all that notwithstanding to call thee a second time, yea and very many and often times, how much art thou then bound unto him for this so passing great benefit? How many benefits are contained in this benefit? One benefit it was to expect and tarry for thy conversion so long time, to give thee space to do penance, and to suffer thee so long to continue in that state of sin, and wickedness, and not to cut down the unfruitful and unprofitable tree, that occupied such a room in the earth and received the influences of heaven altogether in vain. An other benefit it was to suffer thee to commit so many and so heinous enormous sins, and not to cast thee down therefore into the most horrible bottomless pit of hell fire, where perhaps many others are now there tormented even for less offences than thine. An other benefit it was to send thee so many good inspirations, and holy purposes, even in the midst of thy very sins, and wicked life, and to persist in calling thee so long a time, whereas thou in the mean season didst nothing else but offend him very grievously that called thee. An other benefit it was also to bring thy great stubborns and long obstinate resistance at the length to an end, and to call thee with such a mighty and loud voice, that thereby thou mightest rise from death to life, and come forth as it were an other Lazarus out of the dark and obscure grave of thy wicked and sinful life, and not with thy hands and feet bound, but loosed and set at free liberty out of the stinking prison and thralldom of the enemy of mankind. But above all this, what a benefit was it, to grant thee then not only pardon for thy sins past, but also grace from that time forwards not to return unto them again: giving thee moreover all such other ornaments as were given to the penitent prodigal son, when he was received into grace and favor again: by means of which ornaments and graces thou mightest live as the child of God, and contemn and laugh at the malice of the devil, and triumph over the world, and take a sweet taste of the things appertaining unto almighty God, which before seemed very unsavory unto thee, and withal conceive a certain loathsomeness and misliking of the things of the world, which before seemed very savoury and delightful unto thee.
But now besides this, what if thou do consider unto how many others almighty God hath denied this benefit, which he hath so freely granted unto thee. And whereas thou being a sinner as well as they, and as unworthy of this calling as they, yet it hath pleased almighty God to suffer them to continue in their wicked state, and to call thee unto the state of salvation, and grace? What an exceeding joy will it be unto thee, when by the virtue of this vocation thou shalt see thyself to have the fruition of almighty God for ever and ever in the kingdom of heaven, and shalt see other of thy companions and acquaintance for want of the like grace of God to remain everlastingly tormented in the horrible raging fire of hell? O good Lord, what a number of things are there included in this grace to be well weighed, and earnestly considered upon! Tell me I pray thee, when the blessed thief (who with one word purchased life everlasting) seeth himself in that so great glory which he now possesseth in the kingdom of heaven, and seeth his companion also in those great horrible torments of hell fire, and calleth to mind withal, that he himself was a thief also as well as the other, and suffered for his robberies as the other did, and that a little before he blasphemed our Savior Jesus Christ in like manner as his companion did, and that yet for all this it pleased almighty God to cast his merciful eyes upon him, and to give him so great a light, leaving the other thief in his darkness, now in considering hereupon, what thanks thinkest thou doth he render to almighty God for this special grace? How wonderfully doth he rejoice at so great a benefit? How doth he marvel at so great a judgement? With what a passing great love doth he love him, that would vouchsafe to prevent him with such a singular and wonderful grace? Now if this seem so great a benefit unto thee, remember thyself, that our savior Christ hath bestowed the like inestimable benefit upon thee, when the same loving Lord vouchsafed to cast his merciful eyes so specially upon thee, and did not with the like manner of calling call thy neighbor, companion, or friend, who peradventure had less offended his divine majesty than thou. Consider then how much thou art bound to our Lord for this his great benefit, and what a great occasion is here offered unto thee, to desire even to suffer death for the love of him.
Besides all this, consider how costly and chargeable this benefit of our redemption was to our Savior Christ, which was so freely given unto thee. Unto thee it was given frankly, and of mere grace, and it cost him even his own most precious blood, and life also: for it is manifest that without the same our sins could not be pardoned, nor our wounds cured. It is said of the Pelican that she bringeth forth her young ones dead, and seeing them in that case, she striketh herself upon the breast with her beak, until she cause blood to issue out, and therewith she batheth her young ones, and so they receive heat, and life. Now if thou wilt understand how great this benefit is, make accompt with thyself, that when thou wast dead in sin, that most loving and merciful Pelican (our Savior Christ) moved with most tender pity and compassion stroke his sacred breast with a spear, and washed the deadly wounds of thy soul with the precious blood of his wounds, and so with his own death he gave thee life, and with his own wounds healed thy wounds. Be not thou therefore unthankful unto him for this so great and costly benefit, but as our Lord admonisheth thee, be mindful of the day in which thou camest out of Egypt. This day was the day of thy Passover: this was the day of thy Resurrection: forsomuch as upon this day thou hast passed through the red sea of the blood of Christ unto the land of promise, and upon this day thou hast risen again from death to life.
OF THE PARTICULAR BENEFITS THAT ALMIGHTY GOD bestoweth upon us.
These benefits aforesaid are general. Other benefits there are more particular, that be given to particular persons, the which benefits none other knoweth but only he that hath received them. In this accompt are reckoned many kinds of benefits, either of fortune, or of nature, or of grace, which almighty God hath given to each one in particular: and also divers and sundry miseries, and dangers, both of body, and soul, from which he of his mere mercy hath delivered us. For which particular benefits we are as well bound to give him thanks, as for the former general benefits: forsomuch as they are more certain signs and tokens of the special and particular love, and providence, that our Lord beareth towards us. Such benefits as these are can not be written in books, but every one ought to write them in his heart, and so to join them with the other general benefits, and to give most humble thanks unto our Lord for them.
There be also other benefits yet more secret and hidden than these, which are unknown even to the very party himself that hath received them. These are certain privy dangers, and secret snares, which our Lord is wont to prevent and disappoint by his divine providence, for that he understandeth what great damage and prejudice they might do unto us, in case he should not cut them off, and disappoint their course. What man is able to tell from how many temptations almighty God hath preserved him? And from how many occasions of sins he hath delivered him? And how often times he hath stopped the passages, and removed away the deceitful snares of the devil our enemy, that we should not fall into them. The devil himself saith of the holy man Job: That almighty God had environed him on every side, that nothing might do him hurt. And even so is our Lord wont to keep, and preserve such as be his, (as it were a glass preserved in his case,) that nothing may hurt them.
It may also be that a man hath received of almighty God some secret gifts, although he himself knoweth not of them: as also a man may, and is wont to have many secret sins, which he himself that commiteth them knoweth not. Wherefore like as for these kind of sins we ought daily to pray with the Prophet, and say: Ab occultis meis munda me Domine. Deliver me O Lord from my secret sins: Even so ought we also every day to yield him most humble and hearty thanks for these kind of benefits, that by this mean no sin may remain without penance, nor benefit without rendering of thanks for the same.
OF PRAYER AND MEDITATION 